I Come From Foreign

I’m late all the time. I have no perception of time. Time is for white people. It doesn’t work with me.”

~ Erykah Badu in in the new issue of Blender magazine

Amen, sister.

Most of y’all have heard of island time before. It’s about a half an hour, hour, two hours, behind what other people would deem “real time.”

Well I’m just here to go on record to say that island time is a beautiful, beautiful thing.

In general, people in foreign are much more punctual than us Caribbean folk and it’s definitely gotten me in trouble in the past.

That’s why I like California.

Nobody rushes here.

The East Coast (yup, even Miami) is all hustle and bustle and go, go, go. Out here in LA, we take it easy. Maybe the days are longer or something, I don’t know.

In its time, in its time. And that is a beautiful thing. Who wants to be a slave to a clock? Is that any way to live?

Doh rush me, nuh!

Much like the feisty Ms. Badu, I have no real concept of time. Actually, what it is is that I perceive time as a fluid entity–sometimes it goes fast, sometimes it goes slow, and at the end of the day you don’t know how it’s gonna roll so just sit back and let it be.

I could start getting ready to go out three hours beforehand and still not have enough time. On the other hand, I’ve gotten ready in as little as 10 minutes on some, albeit rare, occasions.

Dude, what’s the rush?

I’m decidedly anti-rush.

It kills my vibe.

You make me rush and you get mean Dan.

Mean Dan makes you late on purpose because you have disturbed the sanctity of her getting ready process.

And it is a process.

I’m not talking girly-wise with the hair and the make-up and the trying on three million outfits although I do that as well.

The process I’m talking about is about getting into the right mindset, psyching yourself up for what’s to come, drinking tea and deep long, cleansing breaths to calm your aura. It is a beautiful and necessary process and if it makes me two minutes, twenty minutes, or two hours late, so be it.

I guess my problem goes back to planning.

I see two hours and think, oh I can do this, this, and that, and then I’ll still have a half hour to get ready and that will be more than enough time. And then somehow it’s five minutes before we’re supposed to leave and I’m now jumping in the shower.

And I still won’t rush.

You rush me, you won’t really want me around for very long.

Being on time kind of makes me angry.

What is the benefit of being on time?

Everyone knows that getting ready is the most fun part of the going out process. Why deny me that delicious experience and substitute it for getting to a half-empty place where the vibe hasn’t even been set yet and everyone’s waiting around for everyone else to get there and being awkward.

Noooooooooooooo thank you. What a waste.

But that doesn’t mean I’m aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaalways late. Sometimes it’s not your shit going on and you have to suck it up and be respectful of others.

In those times, I try really really really hard to be on time. I’ll start my process four hours before so I’m in the right frame of mind to take on whatever it is I have to deal with next.

In those times, the bf will generally stick his head around every 15 minutes or so to remind me that time is actually passing and forward motion is required.

In those times, I don’t like it very much.

as opposed to…

and guess which one had more jelly…

P.S. This is what TT$3 equals.

Parking lots are far far far away…

When (not if, when) I go back to Coachella next year I will probably (hopefully) do some things differently next year. I wrote them down here so I don’t forget (I heart lists) and for all you other concert newbies living in foreign.

1. Much like Tobago sun, desert sun is a beast all of its own. If you’re an islander like me you might feel like you could handle heat. Well hear what. I’ve never been in a Caribbean location where it ever tops 95 degrees. Something to do with the humidity. In the desert, brace yourself for 100+ and DRY. DRY when I tell you dry. And so you accommodate the beast; he does not accommodate you. Wear the thinnest, loosest piece of cotton (it has to breathe) you own and pleeeeeeeeeeeeenty sunscreen–only SPF 30+ and up will do. Also a bandanna for the dust and a bottle of water at all times. Just dont stop drinking.
2. Early is no good. We got there at three (it started at 2) and it was just too hot. I honestly wondered how I was going to make it until 10:45 for Prince but as soon as the sun started going down around 6:30 I was happy like pappy and skipping around like a lamb.
3. Figure it out beforehand. We had an idea of who we we wanted to see and kind of sort of when but we left a lot of things up in the air. We had to go hunting around for a schedule to figure it out and I think we lost a lot of time trying to figure out who was playing where and when.
4. VIP all the way. Now, I am a lady of comfort. Just because I’m from an island doesn’t mean I went around the place barefoot and climbing up trees to pick mangos. I neeeeeever did that kind of stuff. I really don’t do grass or general public. I was all pumped up about going to Coachella but that doesn’t mean I wasn’t a bit skeptical about being in the desert without my creature comforts. Well, if you have a VIP pass you have entry to a special, closed off area with its own food, drinks, bathrooms, and seating and its nice and close to the stage. We had VIP passes and I’m not sure if it would been half as fun without them.
5. Sneakers not sandals. I wore a pretty white cotton sun dress with a bathing suit underneath (much more comfortable and forgiving than underwear) and I contemplated wearing sneakers but they really didn’t go so I wore my gold gladiator sandals. Well hello. Open sandals and sandy, dusty, possibly muddy grounds do not mix. Especially if you put SPF on your toesies right before. Gross. I hope hope hope I can revive my sandals. Not to mention, you’re walking all day. While sandals are comfortable, sneakers tend to be more so. So next year, I’ll make sure to wear an outfit that accommodates sneakers.

Okay so there’s my two cents. Please remind me about these next year, folks. And add your tips in the comments!

MARK RONSON!!!!!

Coach-HELL-YEH!! Well let me tell you. I was like country come to town yesterday at Coachella.

LOVED IT!

It was such an awesome set-up and so well done. Five stages, light shows, out-there (in a good way) art installations, billowing tents, and everything all pretty and designy-looking. SO PRETTY. There was this whole area of jewel-toned tents made of a parachute-like material and I swear it was an Aladdin-themed Bouncy Castle for adults.

I tried to play it cool (like I play everything, natch) but I just haven’t been exposed enough. I can’t lie. I was just so happy to be there that honestly it didn’t even matter at first if I actually got to see anybody play. I was just in it and content. For once I was in it! Oh I mean I know it’s a big hipster scene and I forgot to wear my leather headband so maybe I wasn’t as cool as some of the other people there but I wasn’t playin’ my outsider crap for once and it was good.

Anyway, I didn’t get to see everybody or as much of the people I wanted to (them’s the breaks) but here’s who I did get to check out:

• Boys Noise: Man, the music was just calling us! We were watching MGMT but it was waaay too crowded and it’s just not cool to be so close to people when it’s 100 degrees out (human smells no good) so we followed the beat to Boys Noise and they rocked it out. Don’t know much about electronic music (not my favourite) but they knew how to pump up the crowd and put on a good show. Well done.
• Hot Chip: More electronic music. I was pleasantly surprised at how melodic they were though. Definitely good party tunes.
• Craftwork Kraftwerk: Apparently, they’re gods. You can definitely hear their influence in Daft Punk but their pace is slower and maybe a little bit more reflective? German? I’m no expert but that’s my two cents. Two thumbs up.
• Mark Ronson: Definitely my highlight of the night! One of the reasons is that we were so close to the stage so the vibes were strong and he was just rockin’ it out. (Did you see the kick-ass pic from the bf above? INSANE! He’s a cutie, right?) The first song he played was Toxic and then RhymeFest joined him on stage and he really got me jumpin up and down and whoopin and yelling. Unfortunately, someone else we really wanted to see was on at the exact same time so we only got to hear wo songs before we moved on to…
• MIA: Man, I wished we had been there earlier (although I don’t think I would have given up seeing Mark Ronson). Her tent was soooo crowded that honestly it was a little hard to get the full power of the music but from the looks of the crowd she did it up right.
• Portishead: So many people seem to worship this group and I never really got it. I mean, all I knew really was that one song from like 10 years ago that went big (Nobody loves me) so i was really curious to take a good listen and see what the fuss was about. OMG Beth Gibbons has the most hauntingly beautiful voice I have heard in a long time. She is mesmerisingly good. I want to be her.
• Prince: The headliner! This was another bit of disappointment as we left about two songs into the set to beat the crowds. Hey when you’ve been sitting in the sun for 8 hours and have to drive 2 more to get home sometimes you have to make sacrifices. It is what it is. I can’t say too much since I really didn’t get to hear enough but I’m sure he rocked it out good and hard.

So all in all it was an amazing first outdoor concert/ music festival experience. I absolutely cannot wait for next year. Maybe I’ll get lucky and they’ll have a reggae-type artist on the line-up.

Oh!!! And lest I forget, celebrities for DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYS. I didn’t take pictures of any of them. I’m too much of a coward to try to sneak shots and way too cool (ha ha) to actually acknowledge them by asking to take their pictures.

Seriously, though, it was a lot of fun checking up on D-Listed and Perez today so I could be like: I saw her! I saw him! For those of you who care, here’s who crossed my path:

• Kelly Osbourne (really pretty, actually)
• Dita Von Teese (petite, looks like 12)
• Brody Jenner (douchie but cute)
• Nicole Richie (a bone twig)
• Joel Madden
• Rachel Hunter (not bad for an old chick, says the bf)
• THE HOFFFFF
  (suuuuuuuuper tall)
• Melanie Griffith
• Dude from Flight of the Conchords (complete with tourist-esque bermuda shorts, v-neck t, and straw hat)
• Machel? I could have sworn I saw him… anybody knows if he was there?

Update: Best Week Ever thinks I’m awesome

PSYCHED!!

We got tickets and we’re on the road!! This is why I’m excited.

Pictures and write-up to come…

Picture taken from this article.

You read what I tell you to read when I tell you to read it.

Here’s my take on what’s linkworthy (in foreign-related but some random stuff too) for the week of April 20-25, 2008. Enjoy!

Link Up Massive: Weekly Round-up (April 20-25)

• The 21st century is alive and well in my home country. Come April 29, Trinis will no longer have to brave 3-day lines (so they say) trying to renew their passports. Hmmm… maybe that means I can delay the inevitable… (sidenote: picture above is hilarious no?)
• The bf’s sweet Caribbean sunset pic made it into Flickr: Explore! Thanks to me, of course. We were visiting my brother when he took it Nonetheless, I’m proud. Learn how he did it here.
• So let’s talk about proud. One of my own is livin’ large in the big, bad world of newspaper journalism. He’s everything I wanted to be once upon a time.
• But now I really want to be as cool as this chick when I grow up. An old college friend and fellow writer/ blogger/ editor takes home the Best Beauty Blog from Glam Network.

You guys, I’m bursting with national pride right now. Now I’m always up to pointing out whenever a Trini breaks through the rank and file to make it big. But this time it’s super big.

Davan Maharaj named managing editor of the L.A. Times

(read it here)

Of course, this is close to my heart. I had dreams of such a title back in undergrad days as reporter, assistant news editor, news editor, and managing editor of the Miami Hurricane. Too bad I burned out senior year and decided that I was anti-newspaper journalism.

Yeah, that was around the time I got called out ON MY BIRTHDAY AND WE WERE UNDER HURRICANE WARNING to cover the death of a freshman and interview his family.

Or maybe it was 9/11 when everyone was freaking out and I had to be the insensitive nosy reporter going up to everyone and their mother asking, “How does this make you feel?”

Or maybe it was after I started getting harassing phone calls because we published a story on some dumb frat boys who did something (surprise!) really dumb…

But mostly it was because I just knew I couldn’t keep up that kind of daily pace and make a living out of invading other people’s lives. Academia turned out to be more my thang.

Nonetheless, I will always have the utmost admiration for the journalists out there who have the balls to investigate the big stories and get doors slammed in their faces and fight for the truth.

I believe in the ideals. The reality was just not for me.

Anyway.

So now that I hear a fellow Trini has been named managing editor of one of the most prominent regional newspapers in the country, my cup runneth over with kudos and good will.

Congrats Davan! I can only imagine the blood, sweat, and tears (and talent) it took to get this far.

Maybe I can hit you up for a job someday. We Trinis hadda stick together, right?

Here’s an excerpt from the article announcing the news, showing the Davan’s impressive work trajectory:

Maharaj, 45, has worked as a reporter for The Times in Orange County, Los Angeles and East Africa. His six-part series “Living on Pennies,” in collaboration with Times photographer Francine Orr, won the 2005 Ernie Pyle Award for Human Interest Writing and inspired readers to donate tens of thousands of dollars to aid agencies working in Africa.

Another Maharaj story, an investigative report about a Leisure World attorney who inherited millions of dollars in stock, land and other “gifts” from his clients, led to changes in California probate law.

Maharaj has been an assistant foreign editor and, in Business, served as a deputy editor before assuming leadership of the department last year.

During Maharaj’s tenure, the Business section revamped its coverage to give greater emphasis to consumer issues. It also redesigned its Sunday section to focus on personal finances.

A native of Trinidad, Maharaj holds a political science degree from the University of Tennessee and a master’s degree in law from Yale University.

“Anyone who has worked closely with Davan knows him as a passionate advocate for good stories, and for the people who work hard to produce them,” Stanton said in his memo.

Pronounced: nuh

As in: Why don’t you? or Isn’t that so?

Used in a sentence:

Oh gosh, do it for me, nuh? (why don’t you?)

But he’s a real fool, nuh? (not so?)

Come, nuh man (come on…) [most prevalent usage--the bf hates when I use this on him. It took him years to realize I wasn't ordering to do something "now"]

Top marks for the person with the most inventive use of this, one of the most multi-faceted words in the Trinidadian English lexicon: “nuh”

Enter your submissions in the comments!!!

Elan at Reggae on the River circa (?) singing “Together as One”

I NEVER saw live music in Miami.

I heard that most bands on national tours never came down to MIA because it was too far and cost-prohibitive.

That and the bands that did come were never presented to me in neat little parcels like they are out here.

It’s just a vibe, man.

Live music is pervasive out here and I’ve definitely reaped the benefits:

• Elan (killer reggae artist–see above–from LA and lead singer for the Wailers yes, those Wailers) x 3
• Daft Punk and Rat-a-tat-tat
• Paul Oakenfeld and Underworld
• Ben Harper and Tom Morello

And this weekend at Coachella (annual 3-day concert in the desert but we’re only going on Saturday fingers crossed not definite as yet):

• Prince
• MGMT
• Deathcab for Cutie
• Mark Ronson
• M.I.A.
• and a bunch of others who I haven’t heard of as yet but am excited about nonetheless

And in two weeks (May 10) at Temple Bar for TRINIDAD NIGHT:

• Kes the Band
• Maximus Dan
• Ms Triniti
  

You guys should come!!!

Life is good. Live music is good.

More on the music as it happens…

*See “Trini Talk#2: For days” for explanation of term

Pronounced: for FUH (thanks, Dre!) daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaays

As in: endless

Used in a sentence:

Oh gosh, but we have food for daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaays. Take home some, nuh*.

Top marks for the person with the most inventive use of “for days” in a sentence. Enter your submissions in the comments!!!

*come back tomorrow and I’ll explain “nuh” fuh yuh.